Rough rough rough

I think I am getting used to feeling rough, for it doesn't seem so noticeable any more but if I think about it I actually feel quite terrible. Today I have indigestion to add to my joys. My chest has ceased to be quite so sensitive and intent to expand, so that's something. It's still ginormous and fragile, but ok.

The tiredness is ridiculous, and I continue to find it very difficult to sleep at night. Part of it is discomfort, another part is the perpetual hunger/nausea thing, but the main part is simply not falling asleep. Napping or not by day has little bearing on whether I sleep, so I have concluded I may as well nap when I can as that is as least some sleep.

I appear to be accumulating all the fluid I shall be requiring for the duration of the pregnancy all at once. I am taking in gallons of fluids - milk, water, more milk, juice - and not that much comes back out. My lips are all chapped which is a sure sign of dehydration. I have this firm little bump already, which doesn't indicate twins as it's too high, but it does make me look considerably advanced to what I actually am.  Although I have a sinking suspicion it was this non bump that made me suspect twins last time.  Oh god...

3 weeks and 2 days until scan day. I cannot wait, it's such a very long time. I wish they did the dating scan at 8 weeks, I really do. I kind of understand why they wait till 12 weeks as it must be much harder to accept a baby has gone if you've seen it on ultrasound and until the 12 weeks have passed there is a higher chance of loss. Then again, the potentially at risk ones are the ones that get scanned early. No matter what, my scan is 3 weeks on Friday and then I may relax a bit.

Number one fear: "sorry, there's nothing there/no heartbeat"
Number two fear: "there's two babies in there"

The latter is obviously far preferable to the former and would be delightful in actuality, but one single baby would be an awful lot easier. Especially a girl. I may be cooking two boys though, and this time we are old hands at it so it'd be easier regardless.

One girl. One girl. Please. I know it can't change now, but...
The God of traffic lights says it's a girl, I am craving sweet things mostly and I believe the breasts of enormity are due to excess oestrogen, ie a girl. No scientific basis for that last one, I made that one up optimistically.

We'll see. There's nothing I can do except wait and fret.