I feel strange. It is now 26 September, which is one month after that diabolical day that I attended hospital for a routine appointment and remained for ten days before leaving with my tiny early baby.
More significantly, today is the day that E would have been delivered had all remained stable. This is the day I've been looking to since May.
Instead, I have a bouncing three week old still tiny baby. I cannot fathom why I feel sad/guilty/weird about having her early. This weekend past would have had me stressing, but loading things onto my iPhone, packing nice pjs, organising newborn sized clothes. Nice planning. And today I would have had the section. Which isn't pleasant really, other than the amazing moment of meeting the baby.
E is unaware of this, of course, and is happily adhering to the behaviour expected of a three week old.
She cries more loudly and frequently. Tears are down to hunger, nappy changes and a new addition for three weeks: not being allowed to sleep exclusively on mummy's chest. She mostly feeds well but I have a dilemma of no perfect bottle yet. NUK has proven most successful, the next size bottles of, which she will need as soon as she takes more than 4oz each feed, don't fit in the steriliser. We have an array of Avent things (including the steriliser) but she doesn't get on with the teats. Small ones are too hard work, larger ones are too messy. We have mostly NUK teats on Avent bottles at the moment and they are kind of leaky. Tommee Tippee may be the answer, but we're not there yet.
O was home with a cold today. I am exhausted from sheer lack of sleep. 8pm bedtime for me tonight I think!!
Oh, and my wound is infected, I now need an antibiotic, despite the nurse insisting it was clean.
I need a holiday. Or a maternity nurse. Or a cleaner. Or all of the above.
Showing posts with label infection. Show all posts
Showing posts with label infection. Show all posts
Monday, 26 September 2011
Thursday, 1 September 2011
Birth Day in a few minutes... Probably
I appear to be broken. I feel ok, yet my blood pressure remains high (very) despite medicinal intervention for a full week now. Today I have the addition of a slightly raised temperature and an increased white cell count.
Panic station. I do feel a little paranoid when medical staff go bananas, it does suggest a modicum of seriousness.
But I am pregnant, they never take chances with pregnancy, and apparently infection can make anaesthetists reluctant to make a thonking great hole in my back for the spinal block. No anaesthetic clearly means no section.
But... Unidentified infection makes it more paramount to remove baby from her defective incubator.
So far I have responded very well to antibiotics and my temperature is normal. If it is normal upon waking, my section is now a priority. It should be a matter of hours until baby is born. And hours means about 9 hours. Yikes!
As a scan had been booked, the ultrasound department phoned down looking for me today. I had been told it had been cancelled and indeed had never been told the time it was to have been. So they phoned the ward and the conclusion was that a) my consultant clearly did want it and b) as I was there they'd do it if I wanted it.
What do you think?
She looks well. Everything is as should be and most encouragingly she is measuring large for her dates. She is very happy and she is still a she and I fervently hope that being taken from me a month early does not cause her damage.
One of my room mates had the cutest little boy I've seen early this morning, utterly gorgeous.
Another room mate is breaking my heart, she is 16 years old, 24 weeks pregnant with monochorionic twins and she has pre eclampsia. She was told today that she must remain in hospital until the babies are born and that this could be any day. Bless her, she just wants to be with her mum and she's really very ill. I am her surrogate mummy tonight but I am preoccupied and leaving ante natal tomorrow. The fact that I have twins and have been hospitalised to await the maturity (almost) of my baby means I can be Norma know it all. Which she seems to like poor poppet.
I feel ancient again. Her mum is younger than me.
One more room mate seems to be a possible real friend.
I am so self obsessed, once this is over and baby is all settled, I need to be a better friend to all.
Must try and relax. Sleep is unlikely but reading and chilling would probably be wise.
Baby in the morning. Please let her be ok. Please.
Panic station. I do feel a little paranoid when medical staff go bananas, it does suggest a modicum of seriousness.
But I am pregnant, they never take chances with pregnancy, and apparently infection can make anaesthetists reluctant to make a thonking great hole in my back for the spinal block. No anaesthetic clearly means no section.
But... Unidentified infection makes it more paramount to remove baby from her defective incubator.
So far I have responded very well to antibiotics and my temperature is normal. If it is normal upon waking, my section is now a priority. It should be a matter of hours until baby is born. And hours means about 9 hours. Yikes!
As a scan had been booked, the ultrasound department phoned down looking for me today. I had been told it had been cancelled and indeed had never been told the time it was to have been. So they phoned the ward and the conclusion was that a) my consultant clearly did want it and b) as I was there they'd do it if I wanted it.
What do you think?
She looks well. Everything is as should be and most encouragingly she is measuring large for her dates. She is very happy and she is still a she and I fervently hope that being taken from me a month early does not cause her damage.
One of my room mates had the cutest little boy I've seen early this morning, utterly gorgeous.
Another room mate is breaking my heart, she is 16 years old, 24 weeks pregnant with monochorionic twins and she has pre eclampsia. She was told today that she must remain in hospital until the babies are born and that this could be any day. Bless her, she just wants to be with her mum and she's really very ill. I am her surrogate mummy tonight but I am preoccupied and leaving ante natal tomorrow. The fact that I have twins and have been hospitalised to await the maturity (almost) of my baby means I can be Norma know it all. Which she seems to like poor poppet.
I feel ancient again. Her mum is younger than me.
One more room mate seems to be a possible real friend.
I am so self obsessed, once this is over and baby is all settled, I need to be a better friend to all.
Must try and relax. Sleep is unlikely but reading and chilling would probably be wise.
Baby in the morning. Please let her be ok. Please.
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