Fraught

Oh, I'm a bit worked up.

1 sleep to go. So, boys to bed, tea, bit of TV, maybe a bath, then bed probably not with sleep, then get up, drink lots of water and head to maternity hospital for 9.45.

Aaaaaaaaaargh. It's basically here.

It's only a scan. The probability of there being one perfectly healthy baby in there is very high, as I keep saying, but that doesn't stop the panic.

Two. None. Three. Deformities. None. Two. Tumour. Aaaaaargh.

One. Healthy. Likely.

I feel stupendously pregnant today. Sore, nauseous to extremes, vast chested, fatigued, slow. Wriggles from below are surely foetal. All seems well.

I'm still panicky. Right now I could really go a cigarette. I'm not going to have one, obviously, but I need some sort of crutch and I don't think gummy bears (oh yes) will cut it. Gummy bears it is though.

Are they gummi? I don't care.

Breathe. Breathe. Eat sweets. Breathe. Don't be sick. Maybe be sick?